A Teaser-Bon Appétit

Bon Appétit

A Short Story by Cory Kutschker


"May I take your order Monsieur?" Asked the French waiter. "Yes, yes, I was curious about the difference between the mermaid and merman?" Replied the customer at table three. "Ah, I see, it is mmm as you say in America, the difference between dark meat and white meat. The mermaid is more tender and moist, you see, and the merman is a little more tough and dry. The mermaid is served with our finest hollandaise sauce and a light biscuit on the side. The merman is marinated and topped with our most succulent gravy and a side of cranberries. They are both, I am told, in flavor, a blend between seafood and fowl. Also, you may choose a vegetable to go with this. We offer steamed green beans, a smattering of California vegetables, or our fantastic julienne carrots. "Hmm, I will take the mermaid. And for a vegetable I believe I will have...hmm... the julienne carrots." "Excellent choice monsieur! And what will you have for a beverage?" "Do you have a list of spirits?" "Oui Monsieur, it is next to the wine list." "And what would you recommend?" "Ah Monsieur, I recommend the poltergeist. It has a definite froth and bubbles in your mouth." "Alright, sounds good."  "And for you Madame?" "I think I will have the leg of satyr and with it I shall have green beans." "Excellent choice Madame. And a beverage?" "A Sprite please?" "Certainly Madame, and now Monsieur et Madame please enjoy the complimentary bread.
"Monsieur, may I take your order?" "Yes, I will have the Minotaur prime rib, medium rare please. And I will take that with the garlic mashed potatoes. And to drink I will have the essence of phoenix." "Ah Monsieur, I will process your order absolutamente!"