The Hors d'oeuvres Part 4

That Place, The Gap


A Satire by Cory Kutschker

I want to disclose to you a place that I have begun to loathe, The gap. The gap, that chasm, is wide and darkly yawning. There is a bridge that some have built over its breadth, a single lane, treacherous rope bridge that swings unbiased to the stature of those who tread on its planks. There are many who stand on the bridge over that maw and drop in nickels, dimes, quarters and many others, more superstitious, drop higher currency that flutter down as insubstantial featherweights floating down the fathoms that further digest it towards the bowels of oblivion.
There are many troupes of scientists that have measured its breadth and length. Some claim it as a non-marine Marianas trench but I would hasten to discredit such a shallow comparison. For while some depth measurements for the Marianas trench delves in 11.03 kilometers, the gap dwarfs it by the same instruments being doubled up and still finding the gap to be unfathomable. The gap's length was measured to be 5,632 kilometers long. This is accredited to its serpentine waves across the continent. And at several places is joined by many other impressive rifts. It's width is averaged at several locations to be 87 meters across. The smallest breadth is measured at a mere 56 meters.
It is at this place that the famous Wichiter bridge stretches across the void. It was built in 1955 as an alternative means of crossing the gap as opposed to the one single lane rope bridge that currently remains unnamed. There is currently a budget total of $20,000 per year allotted to the Wichiter's care and maintenance. An approximate total of $563,274 was spent over 25 years. There were only a couple instances where the division of transportation went over budget in its maintenance of the bridge. One such occurrence was the collapse of April 17th, 2006. Only 5 lives were lost in its collapse and has since been improved many times to insure its safety.
The unnamed rope bridge that spans across a breadth of 73 meters is currently protected by a non-profit society that urges towards its historical importance and have placed a plaque on either end commemorating its estimated building date of 1786-1807 based upon Native aboriginal accounts. it is currently one of the greatest mysteries among bridge builders as there are no accounts to any having travelled that way or requiring passage across the gap's width. It is currently one of the very few remaining rope bridges on the North American continent and also mystifies the general public as the longest lasting rope bridge in the world.
Many different sects of religious groups founded in North America have given notable importance to the gap. Some practices have included teetering on the edge of either side as a kind of test of faith and others dangle themselves merely holding on to the edge. Many of the more popular movements of these religious groups insist that they attempt to walk across the void beside the bridge as a testament to their faith. Many legal battles have been fought regarding the disappearances of those individuals who obey such commands. Yet it still remains a practice within these groups.
The gap remains a popular landmark to be visited by youth and adults alike. While youth make up the bulk of its visitors for sport, adults also venture here for several risk taking activities. Also adults are the greatest spenders in regards to such activities. While the death toll among the youth is incredibly high, there are still a large sum of adults in North America that fall victim to hazardous activities. Deaths among the youth are estimated 3,000,000 a year and for the adults 1,500,000. These hazardous activities include such things as: bungee jumping, climbing without ropes and leaping for the opposing ledge. Many states have outlawed such dangerous sports including a hefty fine if caught in the act and yet no arrests are recorded.
While the gap remains to be one of the most visited destinations it still claims millions of lives. It is the current world record holder for the largest rift in the world and has many points of crossing. It has gained the attention and fame by many artists and film producers. And it is rated as the world's biggest tourist destination of all time. Finally, it is the place that shares its name with that popular retail outlet that sells clothes and apparel to appeal to the fashion sense of millions.